Last week, two people I represent tried to end it all. Part of me is glad that neither succeeded, part of me wishes they had been successful. Its what they wanted.
The one guy got out of custody after I won a hearing securing his release. It was a Friday. He had nowhere to go because an order of protection prevented him from going to his house. He literally had nothing except his clothes, his seizure medication, and the money in his pocket. There was enough to cover a few nights at a motel. By Monday, he had no money and was denied emergency housing. With nowhere to go and no one to turn to, with two or three more felonies on the horizon, he decided it was time to end it.
I went to the hospital on Friday night. Walked into his room and found him curled up in bed. The only thing he had left was his little Bible.
He got booted from the psych ward a few days ago. No insurance. Indictments on new felonies went through. Cops were called. They were waiting for him when he got booted. Back in jail.
2 comments:
It's a big freaking game. I just have to keep repeating that I'm sticking it to the man every day. Couldn't stomach corporate shit. The problem is, you gotta do something to put food on the table. If you can live with yourself after you do it all day, there's some small satisfaction in that. I'm up at 3am because my head is going around and around. Small town judges are insane and there are no grand juries or probable cause hearings here. I think really what most of my clients need is just someone who believes them, who treats them as human beings, who doesn't judge or condemn them and who is willing to openly recognize that they are getting shafted, that there's not much that can be done, but I'm down with whichever way they want to go - plead out and do damage control or go for the blaze of taking your life saving to Vegas on trial. I did beat a traffic ticket today on a technicality - case of driving while dark skinned in a nice car. Not exactly justice, kind of anti-climactic, but at least nobody had to just swallow it and shut up. Most of my clients are retained - I'm the lower middle class, come to me when it didn't work out at the PD, ass is in a jam, don't really have a defense but can't swallow this shit trying to get you something just a little better last ditch lawyer. What I'm grasping onto right now is the thought that not many of us lawyers give a shit, what got me to do law school to begin with, and even if you can't fix it, at least you give a shit and your clients might be able to hold onto a little dignity even if they go down. I can see that you bring your humanity into the courtroom - a place that's many times totally lacking in any humanity. Sometimes they have to deal with that. I can't even freaking raise my child and attend to my marriage properly - but I have to pay the bills right now. Ache - luck, health and strength to you, brother. Hold your head high.
You are an incredibly talented writer. Please e-mail me when you get a chance.
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